With an unintended pregnancy, often the focus is mostly how women are feeling. However, men are often affected by pregnancy decisions and it is important for them to recognise how they feel about it. Although a partner may not be a man, male partners can often feel left out of support.
You may be feeling that you have to bury your own feelings to be a strong support for your partner. You may be worried about how you will cope as a father, how you will manage financially or how your relationship with your partner may be affected.
If the relationship with the pregnant woman is difficult, or you are not together, you may feel shut out or helpless. You may disagree with her about what to do next. You may also have questions about where you stand and what your rights are as a father.
Y Bont provides free support giving you space to share and work through emotions and questions.
We can see you on your own or with your partner.
Enquire or request an appointment
When first hearing that your partner is pregnant, you may be:
Positive and excited at the possibility of fatherhood
Shocked due to the unexpectedness of the situation
Fearful because of circumstantial pressures
When faced with a pregnancy decision, men need time to come to terms with everything too. Neither a man nor a woman should make a decision about a pregnancy based on fear, panic or pressure.
Some men feel it’s better or easier to stay out of the decision-making process because pregnancy is to do with a woman’s body and it appears to be just the woman’s choice. Some men may feel helpless. But often women are deeply affected by the way their partner responds to the pregnancy.
You may, as a man, feel relieved that you don’t have to make the final decision. Many men say to their partners “I’ll support you whatever you decide”. This can feel like the best thing to say, but it can just place the burden entirely on the woman’s shoulders at a time when she may be struggling to come to terms with what has happened and really needs your input.
It’s important for everyone that men have the same time and space to consider their thoughts and feelings about the pregnancy and the options open to them and their partner:
Some women may try to sense what their partner wants and go along with it because they are afraid they will lose the relationship otherwise. She needs reassurance that you’re there for her and will be whatever happens. She needs to know what you really think and feel too.
Our phones and email are monitored by volunteers. If your call is not answered immediately, please leave a message. We aim to respond to all enquiries within 48 hours.
Y Bont offers information and support regarding pregnancy decisions and pregnancy loss. We are not a medical provider, so cannot offer medical services or directly refer anyone for adoption, termination or antenatal care. However, we can direct you to all appropriate services as necessary. 
Charity Number: No 1126108